Everything I own is in a suitcase and waiting next to the door.  The ONLY reason I am not gone is because I felt the spirit’s inclination to stay.  However, I am not that strong.  Today is the last chance (I know something I have said over and over again).  So much for hope of love once had; it seems pretty clear to me that any effort in loving me in merely fleeting.  There is no trust.  There is no respect.  There is no loyalty. At this point there isn’t even friendship.  This is not a relationship, let alone a functioning marriage.  I have no idea why I was prompted to stay when it is clear he has no desire to change.  Maybe it is my fear of raising two kids on my own that keeps me tethered.  Maybe it was a prompt to stay purely based on harm I would encounter last night.  So every day I pray, asking if today I can leave and if the answer is stay, I beg for strength and purpose over and over as I cannot face this rejection every day on my own! So pray for me; pray with me because I have all my belongings packed and next to the door ready to leave.