Feeling GOOD

I was really concerned about the holiday season as now my family went from four to three and despite al the heartache, you can't help but think of the person who is missing and all the good times had in the past. And while I do have moments of reverie, it has been a lot easier than I thought and I feel a large part is due to this:
About two weeks ago I joined an online dating site.  I joined the one I did as you chose for what purpose you want to meet other LDS singles, by being specific about what you are looking for.  some of the choices include: friendship, pen pal, travel partner, etc.  So on my profile I have made it perfectly clear 1. I am still in the middle of a divorce and 2. I have two very small children. 
To be honest I didn't expect much to come from it as I decided I didn't feel comfortable seeking anyone out myself.  If someone was truly seeking what I was looking for: friendship and just someone to hang out and do things with, then they could approach me without there being any confusion about intensions.  I was actually really surprised by how many people reached out to me and while I have come across several with soiled intentions, I have come to know one or two people who I can see a genuine friendship with.  Not only this, but many of the people I communicate with have gone through extremely similar situations as mine.  In a weird way, it has almost become a little bit like a support group. 
For so long I have just felt trapped.  Stuck in some sort of eternal limbo and it was wearing me down to nothing.  Now that I am finding myself and hope to file for divorce this coming week I can see just how I am moving on, even if there are days or nights I still feel stuck in the past. 
I feel like for the first time I can accept compliments without feeling the need to deflect them.  I can rely on myself and no longer turn to meaningless relationships to seek fulfillment.  I am becoming proud of what I am, and am making friends that understand, support, and build me up.  Although I have not started this new chapter, no novel.  I have the new one purchased and ready as soon as I reach the last page of this one.